


Old Number Seven

by Frostii1031



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Daddy Issues, Gen, Magic, Panic Attacks, Protective Marinette Dupain-Cheng, SADrien, Sick Adrien Agreste, chat noir's bad luck cancels out ladybug's healing powers, chloe is actually a good friend, comforting! Plagg, im sorry, let the boy eat, making up lore as I go, marinette tries her best
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-16
Updated: 2019-02-26
Packaged: 2019-06-11 06:21:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15309327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Frostii1031/pseuds/Frostii1031
Summary: He twisted his wrist, appreciating the sight of the ring on his delicate tanned finger. The metal against his skin hummed with untainted power, singing to be used."Adrien," It whispered, "Adrien...." The sound of his name, twisted and curled and dripping with promise ran shivers up his spine.





	1. History Lessons

When he was given the ring, he thought it was a joke. The power to do great things, to be great. To destroy. Power beyond the mortal plane of understanding, but limited in its use.

Looking at the piece of jewelry sitting smug and comfortable around his ring finger, it wasn’t hard to see it as an all-powerful device. It was beautiful and otherworldly in its design, crisp silver with just enough shine to gleam.

He twisted his wrist, appreciating the sight of the ring on his delicate tanned finger. The metal against his skin hummed with untainted power, singing to be used.

"Adrien," It whispered, "Adrien...." The sound of his name, twisted and curled and dripping with promise ran shivers up his spine.

The sound didn't come from the tiny demi god huddled in his shirt pocket, but from what felt like was inside of him. The part of him with claws and teeth and a burning desire to help, to do something, anything. The ring gave him an edge, but the will was all Adrien. The desire was simply heightened, dragged out to the surface.

A few months after he first received the gift, Adrien sat in the pale Parisian moonlight. Stars flickered daintily overhead, and the boy, clad in only a pair of jeans and thin t-shirt, dimly registered the cool autumn temperature. His skin was sensitive with goosebumps, but even still he was sprawled out upon the rooftop, thin legs dangling over the edge of the building and arms pillowed beneath his head.

His eyelids were heavy, but the crisp air and thunderous purring coming from the kwami lying next to his ear kept him awake. All was quiet, and Adrien couldn't help but let his mind wander.

Distantly, he heard the soft voice echo in the back of his mind. The mysterious connection had been a fixture of Adrien's life since the first wonderful day he used the power of the black cat. When he found the sleek black box resting on the table, he couldn't hear a voice, per se, but rather a whisper. Like the sound one hears when walking alone and so sure they heard a voice in the wind, nothing but the implication of words and anxious anticipation.

Opening the box did nothing to make the words clearer, but the entrance of the little demi god had changed Adrien's life for the better. His cryptic voice, light and squeaky yet knowing and promising, did not match the gentle, pleading caress that came from somewhere within the boy's inner ear. When the ring was in action, and Adrien became Chat Noir, the voice gained strength, becoming a pleasant hum in the back of his mind. Pleading with him to use them, to access their power, to let himself become great.

Adrien didn't know what power it was talking about, but it made him nervous, sent shivers down his spine and pink butterflies behind his eyes. When it wasn't trying to persuade the boy into tapping into unknown strengths, it was directing him. Guiding him. It murmured in his ears, telling him when to duck, when to retreat, when to strike and pounce and _claw_.

Chat Noir's normally superhuman reflexes turned deadlier, sharper and more precise. While his Ladybug stumbled and hesitated, dragged her feet or softened her punches, Chat Noir danced. His movements gained a sense of grace only those well acquainted with battle could achieve. He twisted and turned, dove and jumped and kicked and bit with all he had. Some of it was Adrien, with his toned reflexes earned from years of fencing. Some of it was Chat Noir, with the subtle influence of Plagg and his new abilities and powers.

But most of it originated from the voice. After the first few lessons and instructions, Adrien was able to remember its teachings. With the help of the ring, he grew.

Some days, he saw the look in Ladybug's eyes. She would stumble in her steps, lips parted as she watched her partner. Her mask, fitted to her face and brows, pinched, and she looked....

She looked worried.

Adrien wasn't sure what she could be worried about. In fact, he's only gotten more helpful since the start of their partnership. He would never be able to match Ladybug in terms of strength, and bravery, and power, and kindness, and, well, in her _everything_. But he was getting better. He wasn't useless anymore. He wasn't just there to hold her back, anymore. No more getting turned into a puppet by the akuma, or getting in Ladybug's way. He was helpful, now. He's learning to take the hits she can't, to make the blows she would never.

Adrien sighed, letting his eyes flutter closed as he wallowed in the dark feeling spreading inside his chest. It was dark and sticky, grasping at the boy's throat and twisting his thoughts until his breaths were shallow and quick.

He didn't want to be a hindrance to his Lady. He wanted to be better.

"Adrien?"

The boy swallowed and blinked his eyes open. Plagg was sitting on his chest, small body swaying to the frantic rhythm of Adrien's breaths. His big green eyes were dark with worry, tail flicking anxiously behind him.

Forcing himself to calm down, Adrien took a deep breath and pushed himself into a sitting position. Instead of letting himself fall over to the ground with Adrien's movement, Plagg floated up to the boy's knee.

"Hey, Plagg. What's up?"

The cat scowled and swiped at Adrien's nose. The boy squealed and rubbed at his face, eyes wide with surprise and red tinting his cheeks.

"Don't treat me like an idiot, boy!" The kwami hissed. His tail was swishing back and forth in aggravation, and Adrien sighed.

"Sorry, sorry!" He dropped his gaze, shoulders slumped as he explained. "I was just... having a moment, I guess."

Plagg rolled his eyes, but his gaze softened as he kneaded at the boy's denim clad knee. "I gathered that. We've really gotta work on that anxiety of yours, kiddo."

Adrien hummed.

The small creature hesitated, before pawing more insistently at the blonde's leg. "So, what got you this time?"

Adrien groaned, burying his face in his hands in embarrassment.

"Aw, c'mon kid, you can tell me. I've dealt with tons of cats just like you, y'know." Plagg simpered, "Bad luck runs in our veins, Adrien. Nine times out of ten a cat's got just the same issues with anxiety as you do."

Peaking between his fingers, Adrien whispered, "Really?"

Plagg nodded remorsefully. "Unfortunately, even our own heads have got it out for us."

Adrien glanced away, and silence fell. Plagg waited patiently, it wasn't the first attack of Adrien's that the cat has witnessed, and he knew time was what he needed.

"I just." The boy dragged a hand through his hair roughly, gritting his teeth in aggravation. "I hate how useless I am to her."

Plagg blinked, before flying close to Adrien's face, a snarl on the black cat's lips. "You're not useless, Adrien."

"But-""

"No." He snarled. "Listen to me. Without Chat Noir, without us- you- there would be no Ladybug."

Adrien leaned forward, frowning, "What do you mean?"

Plagg sighed, easing his way back to Adrien's knee. "Ladybug wouldn't last a day without her partner. They never have."

He paused, looking into Adrien's eyes before continuing. "There have been seven instances where the Ladybug and the Chat Noir were separated. Five where the cat died. One where she went missing. And one where there wasn't a cat to begin with."

Adrien held his breath, green eyes wide as he listened to his friend. "What happened to them?"

Plagg frowned, "They lost. All of them."

"To who?"

"To themselves, Adrien."

Adrien's heart was beating wildly in his chest, hands frapped tight at the roof tiles below him. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, that there needs to be a balance to everything, kid. There can't be good luck without the bad. There can't be Ladybug without Chat Noir. When the balance was tipped, when the unfortunate events that follow our kind like a plague vanished, the good luck was tainted."

"Everything that Ladybug did, all the things they fixed or healed or saved, they became... wrong. The people she saved ended up passing to increasingly bizarre coincidences. To bad luck. The objects and buildings she repaired crumbled to debris within days. The akumas that they defeated came back, stronger and deadlier and more resilient than before."

Adrien's stomach was in knots, what happened before was terrible, nauseating in its looming possibility. His hands shook, deathly cold in the face of the night air.

Clearing his throat, which had suddenly become too thick, he asked, "What about the Ladybug who didn't even have a cat? Why would only one half be chosen?"

Plagg stayed silent for a moment, face dark and shoulders hunched. Flicking his glowing green eyes up to Adrien's, he breathed, "Don't tell the Bug I told you this, okay?"

Adrien nodded, words caught in his mouth.

Softly, Plagg said, "We all promised to never speak of it again, not unless it was necessary." He glanced up at Adrien, "This isn't necessary for you to know, I suppose, but I want you to." His eyes hardened, "You're not like my other cats, Adrien. You're..." He paused, thoughts flicking almost visibly in his eyes before he settled on, "Different. I can't explain."

"When this Ladybug was chosen, he was chosen to take us down."

Adrien gasped, the wind taken from his lungs as frosty coldness crept up his fingertips. He felt numb.

"T-take us down? A Chat Noir? We were- we were evil once?"

Plagg shook his head. "You could never be evil, Adrien. You were chosen specifically because you were so _good_. No, you were never evil. But I was, once."

Adrien kept silent, twisting his hands in nervousness as he listened impatiently. "It was a bad time, kid. My cats... Twice in a row, I watched them die. Twice, in just the span of two and a half decades." Plagg's mouth curled in a snarl, claws prickling the skin beneath Adrien's jeans.

"It was the age of witches, and demons, and pyres. Ladybugs, they were known to be good. Angelic, so they said. But us? We were cloaked in black, with hands like claws that turned everything they touched to dust. We were witches, using the power that 'God' gave us to summon evil and to plague humanity. They wanted us to burn."

"By the time I lost two of my users, I was furious. I hated the humans, and their ridiculous beliefs and monstrous deeds. I hated Ladybug, and their kwami, for being so _pure_ and _good_ while we were so... so unlucky. I hated them, when they did nothing to help my cats when they burned at the stake, s _creaming_ for their Ladybug. Pleading for anyone to help them as my protection melted off them in the flames. I hated them as they _stood there_ and _watched_."

Adrien was speechless. The emotion in Plagg's voice sent pinpricks down his vertebra, stung in his eyes as they welled with empathetic tears. He couldn't believe, couldn't even _imagine_ his Lady abandoning him to the pyre. But, he supposes, not all black cats were as fortunate as he to have such a reliable partner. He could understand Plagg's fury, felt it himself in the depths of his belly, felt the voice of the ring call out to him in dark coils of pain and righteousness.

He felt a stinging sensation in his palms and looked down to find that his nails had bitten through the delicate flesh of his hands. Angry red half-moons were carved into his skin, blood scabbing at the edges and dripping sluggishly down his fingers. Plagg hadn't noticed, so he curled his hands one more and kept them out of the kwami's sight, not about to distract the demi god from its tale.

The cat let out a whoosh of air, slumping on the boy's knee. "After Emilie, after she..." He swallowed audibly, "I didn't want another hero. I didn’t want to subject another of my cats to the same damned fate. No, I wanted someone who could overcome the people. Who could look into the masses and turn their backs on their pleas and threats and _change things_ "

"So, I chose a villain." Adrien shuddered, biting his lip harshly. "I looked for the very characteristics I had always known to avoid before. I looked for someone who was privileged, the world at their fingertips with no hesitation to use it. I looked for someone who was cruel and cold. Someone who looked at the people around him and saw nothing but _disease_."

Plagg closed his eyes. "Ironically, his name was Felix. He was the worst I had ever chosen, and the previous Ladybug was forced to fight him."

Plagg didn't continue with Felix's tale, but the silence said more than his words ever could. It had been a bloody battle. A battle with no winners.

"Basically, Adrien, just know that without you, everything that the Ladybug does would be for naught. In fact, it would be for the worse. You keep her luck from turning gray, you keep her in line and human. You remind her of what you're fighting for. She needs you."

Adrien's eyes were misty, and he scrubbed his hand over them, covering his face for a moment before facing his friend.

"I'm sorry about what happened to them, Plagg. And to you." The cat nodded, and he continued. "What you said makes sense. I- I'll try to remember it the next time I feel down."

He still felt a bit empty inside, but he knew now, logically, that he was needed. That he wasn't a nascence to his partner. In the back of his mind, the voice hummed satisfactorily, like it was proud.

The boy hesitated but spoke before he could let himself be talked out of it, "Say, Plagg. Have any of your previous chosen ever mentioned anything about a voice?"

The cat tilted his head curiously. "A voice?"

"Yeah, like... a whisper." Plagg waited for more of an explanation, and when it became clear that Adrien was done talking, the kwami huffed.

Shaking his head, he said, "No. Never heard anything 'bout a voice. Why?"

Unease bubbling in his gut, the blonde murmured, "Oh, no reason. Just thought I read about it somewhere."

The cat 'mhmed' disbelievingly but let the subject drop.

 

They stayed there on the rooftop for a while, basking in the moonlight and the rare moment of peace from their usual hectic schedule. The past few months after gaining the miraculous haven't been the easiest for Adrien, what with the constant push and shove between school and studying and piano and fencing and Chinese and modeling and the occasional Paris saving. Adrien has gotten used to the two-hour power naps at night before rousing and smudging concealer under his exhausted eyes.

He's gotten used to the disappointment of no one noticing his decreasing energy levels, his slumped shoulders, his soft sighs or messy hair. The most he gets is a disapproving tsk from Natalie and wide eyes from his friend Marinette. Although, he gets that all the time from her. Plagg seems to be a bit concerned for his hero more often, showing his worry through offers of camembert and snuggling up close during their minute naps.

He felt Plagg shift, stretching his cramped muscles before gently kneading the boy's knee with his claws.

"It's about time we get going, kid." Adrien sighed, but gathered himself to his feet anyways. Taking one last longing glance at the comfy spot they just vacated, the boy stepped to the edge of the rooftop before whispering, "Alright, Plagg. Transform me."

The rush of adrenalin that comes with being Chat Noir will never cease to amaze him. When he was armored with claws and teeth he felt like he could do anything, like he could go on forever without burning out.

His footsteps were muffled as jumped from building to building across Paris, leaping and soaring casually as he enjoyed the freedom Adrien could never achieve. The night was quiet and demure, the comforting scenery of shops and comfy houses easing his nerves. He jumped the fence of the Agreste mansion, extending his staff until he was well above the rooftop. He swung his body and landed perfectly on all fours before letting himself slide down the shingles. He dropped down to the balcony connected to his bedroom and sighed, already missing the freedom of the miraculous's disguise. The door to his room was locked, of course, Gabriel would never let his son have the means to sneak out, but locks meant nothing to Chat Noir.

Crouching, he used his long claws to pick the lock before stepping inside. He let the transformation drop, Plagg swirling out of his ring and landing on the bed with a soft thump. The cat immediately perked back up, disappearing to go find himself some cheese and refuel.

Adrien sighed and flopped down onto the bed, not even bothering to change into pajamas before he fell asleep.

 

Adrien Agreste does not usually dream, or if he does, he doesn't remember come morning. But occasionally, Adrien does dream. And when he does, he flies. There are no bars, no cages keeping him locked away. He is free in his dreams.

In this dream, however, Adrien was not flying. He was falling. He was in all leather, tail and cat ears whipping in the vicious wind, cheeks red and stinging with burning eyes. As he fell, he reached out, desperate for something to grab onto, anything to save him.

In front of him, his ring glowed. It was brighter than Plagg's usual color, the green so blindingly bright it was almost white.

"Adrien...." A voice whispered, "Adrien," It got louder, the further Adrien fell, growing urgent. "Let me help you."

Adrien hesitated, and the voice shouted, "Let me-!" But it was too late.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for disappearing lol. here's a long chapter to make up for it?  
> i also formally apologize to adrien for making him sad pls forgive me

Jerking up straight, Adrien gasped as he was ripped out of his sleep. At his door, a loud knock was banging on the door, no doubt the Gorilla coming to wake him. 

“I’m up!” He yelled, jumping out of bed and rushing to the private bathroom. 

Looking in the mirror, Adrien sighed. Dark purple crescents hung from his eyes, and a badly healed bruise from Noir’s cat fight three days ago licked his jaw and curled up to the base of his ear. What normally would spell out a broken jaw for most buffered into a nasty blemish for him. 

He sluggishly reached for the concealer, his closest friend these days. In the back of his mind, he wondered how his father would react if he showed himself looking like this. Yell at him for dirtying the Agreste public image, most likely. 

Plagg watched him with unblinking eyes, and when he finished, he dived into Adrien’s shirt pocket. The ride to school was quiet, as it always was, and Adrien struggled to keep his eyes open. These long nights are starting to catch up with him. 

The walk from the car through the school was a blur, and Adrien is concerned to say that he really has no idea how he got to his desk. Anxiety pooled deep in his throat, maybe he should take a break from his nightly activities, if only to keep sane. 

“Adrien! What’s up my man?” Adrien jumped, his muscles wound too tight, his nerves on their last strand. “Oh, sorry, man. Didn’t mean to scare you.” Nino laughed, collapsing into his chair beside his friend. 

“It’s alright,” The blond mumbled, embarrassed. He could feel his cheeks heating up. “I’m just a bit more tired today than usual, I think.” 

“Tell me about it, dude. That essay had me dead.” Adrien had already finished that essay three nights ago, but he nodded along, grateful for an excuse. 

He and his friend chatted quietly for the few minutes before class started, and in the back of his mind he noted amusedly that Marinette was actually on time, for once. She sat behind him, as always, with her head resting heavily on her arms. She was fast asleep. 

Alya noticed his gaze, and shook her head fondly. “Said she was up all night finding quotes about the historical implications of the fictional model Frankenstein on the medical and scientific community. Apparently, there was quite a lot.” She laughed, and Adrien smiled awkwardly. 

“I know right! I’m telling you, that assignment was crazy.” Nino chortled. 

Adrien chuckled at his friends, and turned back to face the front of class. His head was pounding, and his stomach was in knots, and he was still anxious about his memory gaps, and he just didn’t think he could pretend to be okay for his friends. His fists clenched under the table, and he could feel the cuts he earned last night reopening and burning his palms. 

Once class officially started for the day, Adrien was able to focus on getting his work done. Unfortunately, that meant he was a bit abrasive toward Nino whenever he attempted to talk to him. He just wanted to get the day over with, to keep his head down and his mouth shut and just go home. 

The bell rung, signaling that class was over, and Adrien sighed in relief. He couldn’t wait to be back in his bed. 

He was gathering his things when he saw yellow hair and pink lips making their way toward him. He turned to Chloe, and shook his head. He couldn’t deal with her right now, if he did, he would end up saying something that he’d regret. 

The girl stopped in her tracks. She may be completely different now than she was when they were kids, but she still knew her old best friend. She bit her lip, and nodded before exiting the classroom, Sabrina hanging off her arm like a lost puppy. 

Adrien bit his lip, guilty for sending the girl away so roughly. He noted dimly his friends sending concerned glances behind his back, but he focused on gathering his things as quickly as was possible. His hands were shaking. 

“A-Adrien?” He paused, closing his eyes as he heard Marinette’s timid voice. He didn’t want to be rude to her, especially not to her. She gets so flustered and shy around him, it’s a wonder he has managed to keep her as a friend at all with his luck. 

With a deep breath, he summoned as real a smile as he could and turned to his classmate. “Yeah, Marinette?” 

She paused, mouth working up and down as she fumbled for something to say. Her cheeks were bright red, and Adrien felt his lips purse with frustration toward himself. He didn’t mean to scare her. 

Finally, she managed to mutter out a weak, “Are you okay?” 

Adrien nodded, weak smile back in place, before throwing his bag over his shoulder and walking toward the door. 

“Wanna get lunch with us?” Alya shouted to his back, but he didn’t respond, just kept walking. 

He kept walking until he reached the bathroom, locking the stall door behind him as he crumpled to the floor. He buried his head in his knees, knobby fingers gripping his hair until his knuckles turned bleak white. He felt Plagg crawl up his side, having escaped from the boy’s backpack. Tiny claws tickled Adrien as the kwami pulled himself up to the crook of the boy’s neck. 

Adrien choked on a sob as he felt the kwami begin to purr, thick rumblings that vibrated against his skin. The sound was comforting, grounding, but it wasn’t enough. Waves of nausea rolled over Adrien, his head a pounding mix of white noise and static. It felt like someone had taken a bat to the back of his skull. 

He sat there in silence for quite some time. Distantly, he heard the chime of the bell that signaled that class was back in session, but both he and Plagg ignored it. Eventually, his eyes dried, and the constant pain in his head simmered to an overwhelming feeling of numbness. His mind and body felt drained. 

“I think you need to take a break, Adrien.” Plagg whispered, voice thick around the purring. Adrien dragged a hand down his face, nodding minutely in acknowledgement. He didn’t want to, but at this rate, he would do himself and Ladybug more harm than good by patrolling with her tonight. 

He stretched his legs, sore from staying curled up so long on the floor. Plagg gently dropped to his lap, small face twisting up as he looked at his chosen. 

“What,” Adrien choked, voice hoarse. Plagg sighed. 

“Your lip is bleeding.” 

Adrien blinked, raising a hand to his mouth. His fingers came back sticky and red. 

“I must have bit it while I was...” He trailed off, and Plagg sighed again. 

Adrien reached over his friend and grabbed at the toilet roll, tearing off the paper and pressing it against his lips. The cotton saturated in seconds, his blood thin and watery and spilling too fast. 

Adrien frowned and grabbed another sheet, and another when the paper grew soggy once more. 

“You’ve got anemia, kid.” Plagg said, wilted at Adrien’s foot and eyes tired. 

“I’ve what?” 

“Anemia.” Adrien stared blankly at the dark kwami, and Plagg rolled his eyes. “Means you’ve got an iron deficiency.” 

Adrien frowned, “I think my doctors would have noticed that, Plagg.” 

“Yeah well, when’s the last time you saw them?” Adrien stayed quiet, frown still in place. “You haven’t been eating enough, kid. I’ve told you, you can’t stick to that stupid diet regimen-” 

“My father-” 

“Who cares what your father says!” Plagg shouted. “This is serious, Adrien! This is really bad!” His chest was huffing, and he paused in an attempt to calm down. “This type of thing can lead to big problems, kid. Especially in our line of work.” He bit out, tone serious. Adrien bit his lip, wincing when he aggravated the cut. 

The taste of iron sat bitterly on his tongue. 

Adrien nodded weakly, once more too tired to argue with his companion. Plagg rose, hovering forlornly in front of the blonde boy. His voice was soft, “You can’t be Chat Noir for a while.” 

Panic, swift and sweet, bubbled like acid in his throat. He jolted, looking at the kwami with wide eyes. His heart was a beating drum in his chest, the thundering so hard it felt as though it was shaking him to his core. “Plagg, no!” He gasped. “You can’t- you can’t take it away. You can’t. Don’t go-” He stuttered, each word like molasses on his numb tongue. 

Plagg sighed, dropping to the boy’s knee. Adrien’s hands were tucked to his chest, cradling the ring and keeping it desperately out of the demi god’s reach. “Stop that. I’m not going anywhere.” 

Relief. He tilted his head, still protecting the ring unbelievingly. “Then what do you mean?” 

Plagg rolled his eyes. “I mean that I’m not going anywhere. And neither are you.” 

“What-” 

“I told you earlier, kid. We’re taking a break.” 

Adrien blinked. “You mean for tonight? I already agreed to that, Plagg.” The kwami shook his head, long whiskers bouncing. 

“No, not just for tonight. For a week. A month. However long it takes to get you healthy again.” 

Adrien shook his head, slowly. Then desperately, as the cat’s words sunk in. “No. No, you can’t do that! A month? Ladybug will-” 

“Be fine.” Plagg insisted. 

Adrien just continued shaking, breath coming in short pants. “No, no you said that she needs us! She can’t go, go an entire month by herself, Plagg! She- she needs. She needs us! You said!” Tears were pricking his eyes, and he could feel the white pallor to his cheeks. 

Plagg just kneaded his knee comfortingly, tail flicking restlessly behind him. He looked sad. “We can help her, but only when she really needs it. She can manage a few akuma on her own. Just until you feel like yourself again.” He promised, eyes sincere. 

Adrien drew a shaky breath, lip quivering. He didn’t want to abandon his partner. “Can I warn her at least? That I’ll be gone.” He begged. Plagg hesitated, forehead pinched. 

“I really don’t want you transforming right now, Adrien.” 

“Not even just to call her? I won’t go anywhere, I promise.” He pleaded, leaning forward desperately. But Plagg only shook his head, avoiding the boy’s eyes. 

“It’s too dangerous,” He tried to explain. The hero’s eyes were dull, misty with unshed tears and red from his earlier panic. His lip was inflamed and an angry red, blood still pricking its way to the surface and streaking down his chin, forgotten. Plagg didn’t want to hurt his chosen any more than he already has, but he couldn’t let him transform again. 

Adrien stayed quiet for a moment, staring absently at the dirty bathroom tiles as the air grew stale between them. Finally, he lifted his head. “Why?” 

Plagg tilted his head, confused. 

“Why is transforming too dangerous? I’m not fighting anything. There’s no risk in me getting injured and bleeding out if there’s nothing attacking me.” Plagg flinched at the blunt dismissal to the kid’s anemic blood, but let the comment go. 

“Transforming takes energy, kid. A lot of energy. Not everyone can handle the strain even at their best.” Plagg explained, patient. “One of the deciding factors of choosing you was your inherent magical stamina.” 

Adrien stayed quiet, but the pained look in his brow told the cat that he failed to see the connection. Plagg sighed. “You had yet to access your capabilities, but they were there. You’re strong. Stronger than most humans usually start out with. But your stores are running low, kid.” 

Plagg leaned forward, forcing the kid to look in his eyes. “Magical energy runs the same as regular energy. You need rest, and food, and rehabilitation to keep it up. Which you haven’t.” He shrugged, “Honestly, I didn’t know that you were running so low until I saw your lip.” 

Adrien twisted the hem of his shirt absently, “Is it... Is anemia some sort of side effect to magical exhaustion?” He guessed. 

Plagg nodded. “Yeah. The more you continue to transform when you reach this state, the sicker you become.” Plagg sighed. “I don’t want you getting hurt from this, Adrien. If you go too far, it can get permanent.” 

Adrien shuddered. The warning in the kwami’s voice was more serious than he’s used to hearing from the cat. His lip buzzed, damp and sticky with the reminder that his situation wasn’t a joke. He needed to stop. Actually stop. 

Closing his eyes, he banged his head against the bathroom stall. Frustration bubbled in his veins, and a faint whisper tickled his ear, immediately drowned out by the white noise still humming painfully in his head. He groaned, and turned to the kwami still sticking tiny claws into denim jeans. Plagg’s eyes were round and remorseful, whiskers dropping in a humbling show of sympathy. 

“Okay, Plagg. I’ll put down my claws.” He just hopes Ladybug will come to forgive him in time. 

 

 

The harsh overhead light licked Adrien’s skin, drawing stark shadows under his eyes, across his cheekbones. The color had faded from the boy’s cheeks, leaving nothing but a pale ring of red left circling his undereyes, creeping up from beneath the concealer smudged over bruised skin. Adrien was a painting of dull greys, awash with deep reds and purples over lips and eyes and injured jaw. 

He looked like a corpse, to be honest. 

It had taken the better part of twenty minutes after their talk to get Adrien’s lip to stop bleeding. It was sluggish and weak, streaming in slow pulses as the boy wasted roll after roll of paper to stem the flow. Now, there was an ugly scab on his lower lip, sore and obvious against his model plush skin. 

The blood had stained his chin, and washing it away had erased the concealer from the bruise on his jaw. The stark purple that erupted clashed with the rest of his makeup, making it much too obvious that he had tried to hide it in the first place. 

Plagg watched his struggle with squinted eyes. His tail was lashing aggressively behind him. He didn’t say a word and neither did Adrien. There was nothing left to say. 

Adrien had never put too much thought into Plagg’s claims that the black cat’s power drew bad luck like a beacon. But now, with his ring sitting harmlessly on a red stained finger, he couldn’t help the bitter voice in his thoughts biting out, ‘Of course. Of course, this would happen to us.’ 

The first step out of the restroom was a bit daunting. He had never felt so exposed before. With pale skin and dark bruises sticking out like a sore thumb, he was more vulnerable than he had ever been. If anyone saw him, if they reported back to his father-. 

His wristwatch told him it was afterschool hours, which was mildly concerning considering he definitely hadn’t meant to take up so much time in the toilet stall. But either way, at least there would be less people around to notice him. 

He would have to walk home. Taking the car would mean Gorilla would notice his disarray and he would undoubtedly rat to his father. The sinking pit in stomach was enough of a persuasion to walk than any anxiety-driven thought on the matter. 

With Plagg in his shirt collar purring comfortingly against his throat, Adrien walked home. 

 

 

Marinette can remember the last time Chat Noir missed patrol like it was yesterday. Given, they had only started up the patrols fairly recently, but still. It had been a few weeks ago. It was a Tuesday night, they only meet up on Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday. She had sat at the top of the Eiffel Tower for two hours waiting for her partner to appear. She remembers the furious pace of her heart, the anxiety that swelled and lingered the further the moon rose in the sky. Eventually, she had ducked her head and made her way back home, skipping the route for the night with a heavy heart and whirring thoughts. 

Two nights later, Chat appeared once more. His shoulders were hunched self-consciously and what was visible of his cheeks behind the mask were bright red. He fiddled with his tail and avoided her eyes and she couldn’t bring herself to be mad at him. 

He told her that his father had unexpectedly grounded him, that he hadn’t had time to leave a message before he was sent away with the door and windows locked tight. She hadn’t the heart to tell him that she would have broken him out that night, she was so worried. Secret identities be damned. 

That was the first and last time Chat Noir had missed patrol. Marinette herself seems to always miss their meetings. She tries to warn him, but she’s not always able to. He never gets mad at her, but the relieved gleam in his eyes hurts her more than any scold he could cast her way. He tries so hard for her, and she always seems to leave him wanting. 

Marinette was sat on top of the Arc de Triomphe, spotted legs swinging below her as she twisted her hands in her lap anxiously. Her yoyo was held between her fingers, innocent in its muteness. It was a Thursday. 

The sky has been dark for hours, now. And Chat Noir should have been here by now. He should have been here thirty minutes ago, at 10 o’clock. But he never came. 

She closed her eyes, forcing a deep breath in a vain attempt to calm her nerves. 

She’s been on edge today. 

The morning had started off fine, just a normal school day. She had stayed up late the night before working on her essay, but she had managed to wake up on time and eat a decent breakfast. She had found a coin on her walk to school, and got to pet a puppy on a leash. She was having good luck this morning. 

Then she saw Adrien. The poor boy looked- he looked terrible. Which is not something one usually says in regards to the famous model, let alone Marinette Dupain-Chang. But she saw him this morning, and she could feel the breath catch in her throat. 

He was slumped over his desk, lips tight as he listened to Nino talk about the assignment they had assigned. His skin was pale, and too even. It looked as though he had plastered makeup on but forgot to contour, his face was flat and tired-looking. Not how it should be. His hair was messy, and his clothes mismatched. He looked sick. 

He barely said a word all morning, and when he did, it was rough and abrupt. Nino kept passing glances to her and Alya, wide-eyed. Adrien was soft-spoken and calm, even shy on occasion. Not that he was being rude today, just that his tone didn’t sound- he didn’t sound like Adrien. 

When the bell rung for lunch break, Adrien was ready to bolt. But then Chloe had distracted him long enough for Marinette to gain her confidence and try to speak with him. Make sure he was okay. She didn’t succeed, exactly, but the intent was there. 

When Alya asked for him to join them and he didn’t even acknowledge her, Marinette knew there was something horribly wrong with her friend. Nino watched the blond leave, bag still shrugged over one shoulder half-hazzardly. He moved to follow him, but Alya grabbed his shoulder. 

“Maybe, maybe we should leave him be?” She suggested, brow furrowed and lips pursed in concern. Nino slumped, still watching the door his friend had just escaped from. They stood in silence for a moment, before collectively leaving for lunch. It was quiet, and took too long, and when they got back to class Adrien was nowhere to be found. 

He didn’t show up at all for the rest of the day, and by the time school was out, Marinette was practically bouncing in her seat with pure nervous energy. 

“I know you’re worried Mari, but there isn’t much we can do right now.” Alya had said, voice comforting as she followed her friend out of the school, Nino right beside her. 

“But-” 

“He’s not answering his phone, Marinette.” Alya pressed. 

“Then we go to his house!” 

“His father wouldn’t let us in even if Adrien were there.” Nino muttered. 

Alya nodded, “And you know how protective that guy is. Adrien was probably scooped up by his driver during lunch and is already back home!” She reassured. Marinette nodded along, knowing that her friends were probably right and she was worrying over nothing. 

But something in the back of her head was yelling at her that the black van waiting at the side of the road looked awfully similar to the one the Gorilla drove. 

She had spent the rest of the day in her room, desperately trying to keep her mind off Adrien by playing various videogames. Tikki tried to calm her down, listing off all types of probable excuses as to why Adrien was so ill-looking and his disappearance, but it didn’t help much. She couldn’t take her mind off her friend. 

Now she was stuck waiting for her other friend, and she was at her nerve’s end. She tugged at her pigtails in frustration. She may not know where Chat is, but hopefully she could still help at least one of her friends. 

Determined, she sprang to her feet and jumped from the Arch, yoyo spinning to the nearest building. The wind was loud in her ears, drowning out the worries from the past day and replacing it with the excitement of Ladybug’s freedom. There was nothing she enjoyed more than just floating through the streets of Paris. 

Soon, the buildings grew more grandiose, spaced out with green gardens instead of clumped together and small. One house in particular was especially separated from the rest. It was gated and closed off, the lawn stretching out in front of it keeping it from the public eye. 

The Agreste mansion. 

Using the roof of the nearest building, Ladybug swung herself over the fence and into the backyard. The house itself was too far away from the other buildings that swinging her yoyo wouldn’t reach her to the roof. 

Quietly, she sprinted to the back of the house, dodging security cameras as she went. The mansion was tall, easily three or four floors. Thankfully, the architecture was definitely that of an artist’s touch, and there were plenty of alcoves and balconies for Ladybug to climb up. 

Grasping her vague chaotic memories of the layout of the mansion from the time Adrien was in danger from the akumatized Lila, Marinette climbed in the direction of her friend’s room. The balcony connected to Adrien’s room was small, much smaller than the rest of the house’s platforms. Like the designer didn’t imagine it to be used quite often. 

Marinette paused on the banister, legs crouched beneath her. Biting her lip, she tried to reason out if visiting Adrien in the middle of the night unprompted was creepy or not. Adrien didn’t know Ladybug, after all. 

Before she could whimp out, the rational side of her brain reminded her that Adrien was acting out of the norm, that he could be hurt or sick and she didn’t know. 

Shaking her head, she slid off the rail and padded over to the door. She tugged at the handle, and was surprised to find it locked. Why would a balcony on the third floor with no other entrances be locked? 

Frowning, she crouched in front of the door, slipping a barrette from her hair and into the lock. She was ashamed to admit that Chat Noir had a point when he taught her lockpicking. It has come in useful a number of times. 

The lock clicked open, and she pushed the door gently. The lamps were off, the only light emitting from the cityscape shining through the ceiling-high windows. They cast the room in a cold wash, unwelcoming and so quiet. Swallowing, Marinette crept forward. 

The room appeared empty, and just the same as the last time she were here. Various entertainment systems were strewn about, but looked dusty and abandoned. A quick movement from the corner of her eye caught her attention, and she spun around, arms raised. 

Looking about, she flushed as nothing seemed out of place. She could have sworn she saw something. Then, realizing abruptly that she was intruding in the poor boy’s room, she came to the conclusion that Adrien was probably hiding. 

He probably didn’t know it was the hero of Paris creeping about his room. Not that she would blame him for not jumping to that conclusion. 

Hesitantly, she called out, “Adrien?” Then, worried that may sound too informal from a stranger, she amended. “I mean, uh. Mr. Agreste?” 

She paused. What was she doing? 

“Um. I’m sorry for appearing out of the blue, I was just-” She cut herself off, words fading to a choked whisper as her aimless wandering about the room finally led her to the giant bed in the corner. Adrien was fast asleep, dark lashes swept gracefully against soft cheeks. His hair was a halo of blond on his pillow, and his lips were pink and open. 

Red erupted in flames on her cheeks. Her ears were burning. Honestly, what did she expect? Coming into his room at almost eleven on a school night? Of course, a good student such as Adrien would be asleep. She was so dumb! 

Hands covering her mouth, she allowed herself to scream internally for a few seconds, still staring unabashedly at her hopeless crush. He was so beautiful. 

But she could have sworn that something had moved, earlier. 

Drawn out of her gaze, her brow furrowed as she noticed the blemish on soft lips. A harsh cut split his bottom lip, scabbed and angry-looking. That hadn’t been there this morning, Marinette is certain. She would have noticed. Looking closer, she felt her heart skip at the sight of blue and purple kissing the soft edge of Adrien’s jaw, creeping up to his vulnerable ear. The bruises were dark and new, something that could have only been done by a fist from their awkward position. 

Vaguely, Marinette remembered noticing the odd flat color to Adrien’s face that morning. How it looked like he had makeup covering him. Hiding these bruises, apparently. 

Anger overwhelmed her. Bubbled in her stomach like acid and drew her hand to her faithful weapon. She wanted to hurt whoever did this to him. Has been doing this to him, as the injuries were from separate occasions. 

The thought that her friend has been suffering all this time in silence was a notion Marinette doesn’t think she can ever forgive herself from noticing. What a horrible, horrible friend she’s been. 

She pulled breath into her lungs, feeling the beginnings of panic gripping her. She forced herself to focus. Focus on who could have done this to Adrien. Careful not to disrupt the boy’s sleep, she sat on the edge of his bed. 

Unable to restrain herself, she let her fingers rest on his hair, stroking the soft locks in an imitation of comfort that he wasn’t conscious to receive. Gradually, they floated down to his cheek, brushing past the ugly hues of his bruise and down to the cut on his lip. Her touch was faint, barely there. But the feel of his skin burnt her senses. Ingrained in her mind. 

Tears burned her eyes, and her throat spasmed. He looked so peaceful in his sleep. The white pallor to his skin took the life away from his face, made him look peaceful in a silent and forever kind of way. He wasn’t supposed to look this way. 

She dropped her head to her hands, covering her eyes in a desperate attempt to ward the tears away. She couldn’t imagine anyone hurting Adrien. His friends were small in number but devoted, and the class loved him. Even the paparazzi that followed him around like gnats respected and adored him. He was such a good person, such a kind soul. How could anyone hurt him? 

The only person that Marinette could imagine capable of such a thing was shockingly, horrifyingly, Adrien’s own father. Her gut twisted, her own loving relationship with her father making her instinctively push the thought away. But she couldn’t deny the facts. Gabriel Agreste was not a good father. The amount of times Marinette had seen the heart break in green eyes as a result of missed parent-teacher conferences, of cold dismissals from empty screens, of achievements brushed away; it was painful. And those were just the cases she had seen firsthand. 

Marinette has had numerous dialed conversations with Nino the past few months Adrien has been around. He would tell her of hushed admissions from the blond. Nino wouldn’t give specifics, and Marinette respected his respect of Adrien’s privacy, but he did tell her that he was concerned. Nino was convinced that there was more to the relationship between Adrien and his father than forgotten birthdays and stony silence. 

Marinette doesn’t blame him for his concern. Looking at Adrien now, she wishes that she had been more proactive when she had the chance. 

She shuddered out a sigh, wiped her eyes and pushed herself to her feet. Stepping out to the balcony, Ladybug made a silent promise to Adrien. 

She would keep him safe. She will have his father pay. 

 

 

Plagg watched Ladybug snap the balcony door shut behind her, not even bothering to replace the lock. He had been surprised to see her at their home. At first, he had thought that she had figured them out. That she knew Adrien was Chat Noir. 

But the way she looked at Adrien was different from how she looked at Chat. Like she loved him. Her eyes gleamed the same way Plagg knew Adrien’s gleamed for Ladybug. 

He had watched the exchange from atop a bookcase, hidden in the shadows. He had originally been taking a catnap in Adrien’s hair-its soft and warm and gave the boy comfort. But the heroine’s arrival had woken him just in time to dash to the other side of the room and out of sight. 

He got a bit creeped out when she started touching his face. It felt wrong letting someone get so close to his charge. He knew that this Ladybug was different. That her and this Chat Noir’s relationship is different from any before them. But past hardships were hard to forget, and Plagg found his claws slipping out involuntarily. He wanted her gone. 

Thankfully she left soon after, and Plagg whipped back to Adrien’s side. He slept peacefully, oblivious to his partner’s arrival. Sniffing his host one last time to reassure himself that there was nothing wrong, Plagg let himself relax. 

He tucked himself back into the crook of the boy’s neck, warm and safe to guard the kid while he rested.


	3. Chapter 3

Waking up was hard. 

Walking home had been hard, too. The confrontation with Nathalie once he got back to the house was even worse. She had arrived to his room just after he had reapplied the concealer in preparation. She stood in the doorway, all harsh lines and unforgiving cold. She told him that his teacher called. He missed half a day from school work. That this isn’t the first occurrence of him missing such time. 

She told him that this behavior is unforgivable. That he should know better. She told him to expect a meeting with his father soon. 

Adrien had stayed quiet, not even bothering to look at the secretary. His hands were steady in his lap, and Adrien felt like they shouldn’t be. The thought of facing his father was usually enough to send him straight into the midst of a panic attack, but he just sat there. Numb. 

Nathalie ranted at him, and when he didn’t respond, she pursed her lips and closed the door behind her. The quiet click of the lock scared him more than the thunder of a slam ever could. 

Finally, alone in his dark bedroom, Adrien’s hands had begun to shake. He didn’t cry. He couldn’t. He didn’t feel anything. He was just numb. 

Plagg had pushed his shoulders and tugged his collar, pointing him in the direction of the bathroom. He followed, and stood in the spray of the shower for a long time. When he reemerged, his skin was pink and sore, and his face was clean. 

He ignored Plagg’s distant buzzing over demands of a real dinner and simply collapsed into bed. It couldn’t have been past nine in the evening, but sleep took him almost immediately. 

He heard the voice in his dreams again. But by the time he woke, all he remembered was the faint whisper of its tone. 

The sun was shining through the bars on his windows, and Adrien had never felt more exhausted. He stayed lying in bed, arms spread and neck warm where Plagg lay curled in his collar. 

“We could skip. Your pops already thinks you are, so you might as well get yelled at for something you earned.” Plagg mumbled. Adrien’s lips twitched, but the smile was sad. 

“School is one of the only things in my civilian life I actually enjoy, Plagg.” He whispered. 

“Weirdest cat I’ve met,” The kwami grumbled back. 

Adrien pulled himself up, letting the comforter fall to his waist. He fumbled his way to the bathroom, picking an outfit from his closet along the way. It was a simple sweater and denim jeans, but comfortable enough. 

Adrien avoided his own eyes in the mirror as he once more applied concealer to his face. He hesitated when he reached the cut on his lip, before sighing and resigning himself to accepting the mark and the excuses he’s going to have to make for it. 

He exited the bathroom and made his way to the door, surprised to find it locked. 

“Nathalie locked it on her way-out last night,” Plagg reminded him. 

Adrien sighed heavily, and banged his fist on the door. He waited a few minutes, but eventually Nathalie appeared, door unlocked. She still looked pissed at him, and she didn’t say a word before turning away and simpering down the stairs. 

Adrien rolled his eyes and followed her down. The chef met him at the bottom of the stairs, wrinkled face crinkling semi-pleasantly as he handed a crisp brown bag to Adrien. 

“You missed supper last night, Mr. Agreste.” The chef supplied. Adrien smiled a thank you and peeked inside. 

An apple and a small container of yogurt peered back up at him. Adrien bit down his disappointment; the yogurt wasn’t even flavored. 

Outside, Gorilla barely even made eye contact with the boy before he slipped inside the car. Guilt welled in his chest. Gorilla probably got yelled at by his father last night, and it was all his fault. 

The drive was awkward, and Adrien exploded from the car as soon as it parked next to the school. He slammed the door shut and ran up the steps, desperate to get away. 

He made it to the classroom without incident and in enough time to eat his breakfast. The food didn’t sate his hunger, if anything, it made the gnawing pains in his stomach grow stronger. Nausea floated heavily through his body, and Adrien abruptly wished he hadn’t even bothered with the meagre meal. The brief relief wasn’t worth the sickening hunger that trailed after. 

He felt Plagg squirm in his breast pocket, and the black spots slowly started to clear from his vision. Adrien groaned aloud and pressed thin hands to his face, fingertips digging into his eye sockets as he tried to force the migraine and the hunger away. 

“Adrien?” 

His hands jumped from his face, leaving pale pink imprints over his eyes. Chloe stood in front of him, alone in the otherwise empty classroom. She looked perfect as always, but her lips were swollen from bite marks and her fingers were wrapped restlessly around the strap of her purse. Blue eyes shuttered with closed off concern. 

“Chloe...” He murmured. It had hit him, suddenly. How much he missed his only childhood friend. 

Her brows pinched at the sound of his hoarse voice, and she tugged at Nino’s vacant chair. Slipping beside him, she placed a hand on his knee, eyes never leaving his face, at the bruises he knows her talented eyes could see through the thin layer of makeup. 

“I.” She cut off, jaw clenching. Her breathing was rough. “I came early. I think we need to talk, Adrien.” She looked so concerned, so achingly similar to how she used to be, when they were young. When she was Chloe instead of the young Miss Bourgeois. Adrien dipped his head, and the hand on his thigh moved to his chin, forcing the boy to look into blue eyes. 

“Adrien. You haven’t been okay for a while now.” She whispered. “I’m done looking the other way while my best friend is hurting.” Her eyes were dewy, and Adrien couldn’t remember the last time he had seen Chloe cry. She licked her lips and forced out, “I miss you.” 

Adrien could feel his lip quivering. He had never wanted to stop being friends with her. Before he had managed to convince his father to allow him to attend school, Chloe had been his one and only friend. She was kind, compassionate. She understood him in ways no one else could. 

She had lost her mother, too. 

She could be controlling sometimes, but Adrien was more than used to being out of touch with what happened in his life. As she got older, Adrien knew something had changed in her. She would come visit him as always, but her actions seemed more as though she were pretending to be Chloe, instead of just being Chloe. Like she was hiding something; performing, for his sake. He would ask, but she’d just act confused until he gave up with a sigh. She would visit after school, done up in perfect clothes and perfect markup and with perfect stories of school and friends and Adrien knew something had changed in her, but he never realized what or how much until he saw her in class. 

The cruel and vindictive girl the students knew was not the one Adrien did. Her antics hurt him, and he couldn’t allow himself to stay her friend when she hurt so many others. 

It hadn’t been official, but they alienated from each other rather quickly. The hole she had left in his life had been filled by night-time patrols and butterflies and training sessions with the voice in his head. 

Seeing her now, seeing her this way; it brought back the times where they were just kids. Crying together in hushed conversations on how their mothers left them, on the daunting expectations placed on their young shoulders. On their pact, agreed upon with a professional handshake with the air of childhood innocence; that they would be there for each other when no one else would. 

God, he missed her. 

He was crying. She was crying, too. The sensible part of his brain told him that there wasn’t much time left before class started. The others would be here soon. But the other part, the part of him that was hungry and cold and so, so alone. It reached for Chloe like she was the sun. 

He felt himself crumple, tears running down his cheeks and shoulders tucked to his ears. He bent forward, and Chloe met him half way. She placed a delicate hand on the nape of his neck, the other on his back as he pressed his forehead into her shoulder. His sobs were quiet, but with every breath his full body shuddered. 

Chloe’s head dipped, mirroring his own as she rested her cheek on his shoulder. Her tears left damp patches on his shirt and he knew that there would be no explaining their appearance. The horrifying thought of his friends seeing him so pathetic drew him away, clenched fingers in the thin fabric covering Chloe’s arms. 

Her eyes were blue, and sad. She dragged her thumb under his eyes, brushed his bangs away from where they stuck to his sticky cheeks. 

“We need to talk, Adrikins.” She whispered, shaking her head. “But not now. I’ll meet you later tonight, okay?” Adrien nodded. 

“Yeah.” He choked. She smiled. 

She wiped her face, and Adrien marveled at how her mascara survived the ordeal. He knew his own face must look a mess. She tutted at him, and wiped at the tracks his tears erased in his foundation; smearing the makeup enough to mask the morning’s events. 

“Good as new,” She smiled. Adrien laughed, the relief that she was here with him again overflowing. 

“Thank you, Chloe.” She paused, eyes bright with an emotion Adrien knew was reflected inside himself before she kissed his forehead and went to her own seat. 

The few seconds after she left and before the bell chimed; the few seconds where the seat next to him was cold and empty; Adrien doesn’t think he had ever been so calm. Knowing his friend was with him once more being more than enough to make up for the eclipsing loneliness. 

He watched with mounting dismay as his classmates entered the room. He didn’t feel like explaining to them what was going on with him. He loved them all, relied on NIno for so much and trusted him more than almost anyone; but his relationship with the other boy has never been nor would ever be as close as the one he and Chloe once shared. 

Nino wouldn’t understand the history behind his tight lips, the inability to blame others for his misfortune. In the past, Nino had come to understand that Gabriel Agreste was the root of all evil and mishap in his best friend’s life. And while he wasn’t necessarily wrong, Nino definitely wasn’t correct. Adrien couldn’t tell Nino anything because his first step would be to blame his father. 

And while he certainly hasn’t done Adrien any good recently, his father wasn’t a bad man. He wasn’t the inflictor of the purple kissing his jaw or the white scars etched into his skin, the void in his chest, the voice in his ears, his thin veins leaking red too fast too much too- 

Nino would never understand. But that wouldn’t keep him from trying. He would ask questions, tear at Adrien until he had something that in his mind resembled an answer. Adrien... Adrien doesn’t think that he could survive it. He didn’t need questions, or answers, or solutions. 

He needed Chloe. Who would listen to his ramblings, his abrupt silences and his quick backtracking. She wouldn’t say a word, just let her friend speak until his voice grew hoarse and his tears had dried. She would listen, and comfort, and placate. But she wouldn’t ask questions. She wouldn’t force him to follow her advice or try to fix things. 

She never has. It just wasn’t how their relationship worked. And what Adrien needs right now is not a friend who wants to help him, but a friend who wants to console him. He doesn’t need to be fixed. He and Plagg are taking care of everything just fine on their own. He just wants a friend. 

But then he saw his friend’s smiling face walk through the door and guilt washed over him like a wave. He felt so selfish, so cruel for not wanting to see his friend when all the other boy had ever done was try to help him. 

The twisting in his gut spread to a tightness in his throat and a numbness in his fingers. The creak of Nino sitting beside him sent his heart into overdrive. 

“Adrien? Bro, you okay?”  
He couldn’t do this, he couldn't do this. God, why was it so hard to breathe? 

“Adrien!” 

Oh. Nino had him by his shoulders, brown eyes wide and panicked. The class was still bustling around them and Adrien was thankful that Nino hadn’t raised his voice or made a scene. His heart was still racing, but the haze over his mind had cleared, the rolling of guilt settling to a steady squeeze instead of a choke hold. 

Adrien smiled, wobbly and completely insincere. “Hey.” 

Nino’s mouth was open, and he flinched back from the blonde abruptly. He fumbled, mouth opening and closing before he practically screeched, “H-hey?!” He shoved Adrien’s shoulder, the blonde watching in confusion. “Dude what the hell!? You just had a major panic attack right in front of me and all you can say is ‘hey’?!” He hissed, mindful of Alya falling into her seat behind them. 

Adrien licked his lips, shocked at how angry his friend was. “I. I’m sorry-” 

“God, don’t apologize for having an anxiety attack, man!” 

“i- um. I’m sorry. I mean! I-” Adrien stuttered, face flushing red quickly as he kept skipping over his words and accidentally apologizing once more. Nino sighed. 

“Relax, Adrien. I’m just concerned. I’ve never seen you that way.” Nino said, brows furrowed. 

Adrien hazard out an overwhelmed laugh. “It’s- it’s nothing, Nino. It’s just been a wicked long day.” 

His friend frowned, “It’s barely even eight am, man.” 

“I know!” He said, voice feverish. Embarrassment still prickled at his ears, unforgiving at the way he apparently freaked in front of his friend, over his friend. He couldn’t believe he had let himself get so worked up, in public no less. 

“Hey, Marinette!” Alya’s voice rang out. Marinette smiled and waved at the girl from the doorway before coming up the steps to join her. She paused in front of Adrien’s desk, eyes wide as though she hadn’t expected to see him. 

He raised a hand to wave at her, limp and weak as the exhaustion from the morning set in. Her blue eyes, if possible, grew even wider and Adrien was worried they were going to pop out of her head. Her face was pale, and there were dark bags under her eyes. 

“Marinette?” He asked. She jumped, blinking owlishly before scrambling to her seat and burying her face in her hands. He looked at NIno in confusion, but he only shrugged innocently. He heard Alya teasing her friend and decided the girl was probably just tired. 

Miss Mendeleiev walked in with a stack of papers under her arm. She slammed them on her table and turned to the class with a rush of air. Her face was pinched, as usual. 

“As we’ve been talking about for the past week, today is the final exam for the chapter.” She waved lazily at the stack, “Come get them.” She muttered, and sat in her chair with a mighty frown, watching the students moan and make their way to the front. 

Adrien was frozen in his seat. How had he forgotten? This exam was the most important grade of the semester! 

His heart was thundering in his chest and Adrien worried that he would faint. He had forgotten. He had forgotten about the single most important exam so far in the year. He hadn’t even studied! He hasn’t paid attention in this class in over a week, so distracted he’s been recently. He felt Plagg squirm in his pocket, and he robotically rose to his feet. 

He grabbed the exam in a daze, foot in front of the other until he was back in his seat. Staring down at the paper, the words mixed together as he realized how screwed he was. His eyes grew misty as he scribbled his name at the top and began desperately attempting to make sense of the first question. 

Thankfully, Adrien was good in physics and was able to gouge up enough background knowledge on the subject to get by most of the questions. His panic had made It hard to focus on the words and numbers, and he isn’t quite sure if he was able to write his answers legibly enough to count for credit. Some questions were harder than others, and he had left them to finish last. 

He was still writing away when the bell rung, and a flash of horror shot through his body. His head shot up, looking desperately at the clock. Around him, the other students gathered their papers and began to make their way to the front once more and hand in their answers. Nino clapped his shoulder reassuringly, but Adrien didn’t even glance at him, just went back to writing out the stupid equation. 

“Mr. Agreste.” Miss Mendeleiev snipped. She held out her hand, eyebrows raised unamusedly. He was the last one in the room. Adrien swallowed dryly, looking back down at the two questions he still hadn’t had time to finish. 

He sighed and shuffled his way over, handing the test morosely to his teacher. 

“I, I wasn’t able to finish,” He murmured, head bowed low. Shame twisted low in his gut, and waves of self-disappointment threatened to wash him away. His father is going to be furious. 

The teacher tisked, “Don’t worry about it. Most students left some answers blank on purpose, Mr. Agreste. I’m sure whatever you hadn’t had time to complete will barely make a dent in your grade.” Her voice was sharp, but her words were reassuring. Unfortunately, Adrien wasn’t in the state of mind to be reassured. 

Adrien handed the woman his exam and shot out of the room, hefting his heavy backpack over his shoulder on his way out. He saw Nino waiting for him in the hallway but he kept his head down and ignored the other boy. Guiltily, he dashed out to the parking lot. 

Gorilla was waiting for him, standing threateningly beside the sleek black limousine with a curl to his lip that indicated he wasn’t in the mood to wait for his bratty charge. Adrien avoided his heavy gaze and slid into the car, door slamming shut behind him. When he sneaked a glance out the window, Nino was looking back with a hurt frown, Alya and Marinette hovering behind him. 

They looked concerned, but Adrien couldn’t deal with them right now. He needed quiet. He needed a break from everything and everyone. His heart was pounding a mile a minute in his chest, juttering through his veins. 

His father is going to be so angry. He’ll probably pull him out of school. 

Adrien had a few days before the results of the test came out, and he planned to spend all of them in his bed. Exhaustion carried over him like a plague, and he’s sure Plagg wouldn’t complain. As he waited in the afternoon traffic, he twisted the ring on his finger. 

Inactive, it shone a dull silver. But in the right light, the reflections encaptured in the smooth surface shaped like faces. He liked to imagine they were the blurred faces of its previous owners, but most of the time, the image all took the same appearance. 

A blonde woman, in her late forties. She was beautiful, though Adrien never got a good glance at her. Every time he noticed her smile, she was gone in his next breath. A ghost fading from his perception. 

The city lights of Paris gleamed through the car window, and Adrien could see her vague silhouette staring up at him through the silver. 

But instead of fading away, she lingered. His finger beneath the ring began to heat up, a welcome contrast to the numb coolness his anxiety had provoked from earlier. 

A soft melody began to chime, distant and unfocused. 

The woman’s face sharpened, and he was able to see warm emerald in her gaze. 

The song floated through his mind, calming his nerves and settling over him like a warm blanket. Distractedly, he realized that it was the voice he so often heard that was producing the song. 

The warmth in his hand began to cool, and the music slowed to a stop as the Gorilla pulled into the Agreste’s long drive way. 

As Adrien exited the car, his mind was clear and worries had faded away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> contrary to popular belief, no I am not making this adrien/chloe. I also dont really intend to have Chloe have onesided feelings for Adrien, either. (i'll explain why in future chapters)  
> i actually kinda really like Chloe and want to flesh out her character some so she will probably be a recurring character in this story!  
> also sorry Adrien its gonna get worse before it gets better

**Author's Note:**

> What am I doing pls help  
> I just love Adrien sm and he's such a sad boy I can't help it. Also I LOVE Adrien and Plagg's relationship, so expect a lot of that in this fic lol


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